As most of you already know, the divorce rate today is very high. In the United States about one half of all marriages end in divorce. It is noteworthy that the divorce rate for Jewish people who marry within the faith is only 25%-30%, but even this is a disturbing number. Though the incidence is more prevalent than in generations past, divorce is by no means a new phenomenon. In fact, it is described in the Torah, in chapter 24 of Deuteronomy.

The Jewish Life Cycle includes many joyous moments, but life is not exclusively joyous. Significantly, our Jewish tradition also guides us through the most painful and difficult of transitions. If a Jewish marriage does come to an end, it should be accompanied by a proper ceremony bringing religious closure to the relationship.

It is interesting to compare the Jewish rituals for creating and dissolving a marriage. Each ceremony includes a document. Every Jewish wedding has a ketubah, and the divorce document is called a get. Though a ketubah is usually adorned with artwork, the get is a simple text. Containing far fewer words than the ketubah, the get is exactly twelve lines long, corresponding to the numerical equivalent of the Hebrew letters gimel (3) and tet (9).

The marriage begins with the groom presenting a ring to the bride and declaring, "haray at m'kudeshet--behold, you are betrothed." The marriage ends with the husband declaring to the wife, "haray zeh gitekh--behold, this is your get."

Though all rabbis are able to officiate at weddings, only rabbis with specialized training are able to preside over a divorce and write a get. The ceremony takes place in the presence of a beit din, or Jewish court of three qualified judges. A very specific format is followed, which includes questions to the husband and wife. Most significantly, the beit din needs to know that both parties are voluntarily participating in this marriage-ending ceremony.

Although the woman physically receives the get in her hands during the ceremony, the get does not become her permanent possession. Instead, the get is kept by the beit din. The ex-husband and ex-wife are each presented with a different document called a petur, which is their written proof that the get was indeed properly delivered and validated.

Traditionally, the husband and wife are both present during the divorce ceremony. However, it is quite common for the husband to assign the rabbi as his agent, to act on his behalf. In such a case, the get is delivered to the ex-wife, but the ex-husband need not be present.

Following the delivery of the get, both the man and the woman are free to marry again in a Jewish ceremony. More significantly, they have participated in a Jewish ritual to guide them through the legal and emotional difficulty of divorce. It is our hope that the Jewish divorce ritual has helped to give meaning to this transition in their lives.